[Note – this post has been edited to remove all of the photos, as Google told me I am not allowed to use copyrighted material and these pattern photos belong to McCalls. Sorry Google. So the post is still here, but the photos are removed. Somehow, it's just not so interesting or fun anymore.]
I had an email to let me know that the new McCalls Spring patterns had been released so I popped over to take a look and was rather bemused. Why were all the ladies changing tyres, carrying bicycles or looking like they had just fallen off one? And in the most inappropriate cycling garb.
She doesn't look happy and I'm not surprised as she is made to stand on one leg in very high heels while balancing a somewhat heavy bicycle. No doubt going through her mind is how she won't need to go to the gym tonight and never realised how she could get such a full body workout with a bicycle.
And while we are here with M6694, let's take a look at this example of the green t-shirt with the white bib and flouncy skirt. This is perhaps the most ugly thing I have ever seen.
And this next poor gal in M6701 spent SO much on all that fabric for her dress, that she couldn't afford a taxi and had to cycle to her night out. And then to top it all, she got those heels caught and had to change the chain on the way getting her dress all covered in grease and gear oil. Oh she wishes she had gone for a simple shift and a taxi.
This poor gal in M6702 got caught by the wind in those voluminous sleeves and fell off her bike right in front of a white backdrop – that was lucky, she won't get marks on her white jeans.
This poor gal in M6709 lost her cycyle-clips for those extra wide trousers and had to leave the bike and walk home or face loosing her teeth as she got all caught up and went over the handlebars.
And in this one, not only has she lost her bicycle, but she has also lost the back yoke and gathers that are shown in all of the line drawings for this pattern. Now where did they go?
And this one is just unflattering for everyone, making it look like her boobs have drooped right down to her waist. She's on her knees praying for a better support garment.
And some other interesting items which don't necessarily include the need for a bicycle, but do include the need that you suspend your disbelief. On this top/tunic/dress someone decided it would be a good idea to include the head and shoulders of some bloke with prominent ears.
In know color-blocking was popular this year and it's in a lot of these new designs, but I think pattern designers can take it too far, cutting garments in lots of unneccessary places to allow for different fabrics. Take this example where 23 blocks of fabric are needed for the top and 37 blocks for the skirt. A popular pattern with quilt makers?
And last but not least, this one caught my eye. Because I had a friend wear something very similar once – to a school disco back in the 1980's. I know there is a current fashion for retro clothing and sewing, but I'm sure most had something a little more stylish in mind.
Of course, its not all bad or funny, there are some patterns I quite like, although none that I am rushing out to buy. But I won't share those, because that would be boring. Who is interested in ‘quite nice'.