Word gets around that you sew after a while. Even for some reason if we don't talk much about our hobby, sooner or later everyone is going to know that you sew your own clothes, or bags or other accessories, or things for the home.
This inevitably leads to the question “Did you make that?” when you are seen in a new outfit, or have a new bag or give a gift of any kind made from fabric, or even hang some new curtains in your home.
How does that make you feel if someone asks? Is it a compliment when someone asks if you made that new dress you are wearing? Does it make you feel good? Do you feel delighted that someone assumes you are such a great sewer that you created garments that look as good as ready-to-wear? Are you thinking that the fit is so good they assume it was custom made? Is it so unique that you just can't buy anything like it, therefore, it must be your own original design?
Or does it fill you with doubt and dread that they think it looks ‘homemade'? Do you worry about the finish, did you use the wrong fabric, is there a loose thread? Or do they just think it doesn't look very good, like you might not have bought it in a shop? Is my zipper wonky? Are they only asking because they think it looks bad and are trying not to hurt my feelings?
Or maybe this is an ideal opportunity and just what you want to hear because you are a sewing teacher or have a store selling your sewn items and it's the perfect excuse for you to launch casually into your sales pitch – get a new customer for your sewing classes or make a sale of a bag just like yours.
What do you say?
It could be that how you react to the question is more important than the question itself.
Miserable moggy – Do you cringe, shy away, say “It's not very good but I sorta like it?” Do you point out the small errors and apologise for them? “It's not puurrr-fect but…” Do you always assume the worst? Maybe the person really liked it and now they might feel bad about asking in case you took it as a criticism. 🙁
Happy puppy – Or do you beam and smile, take it as the biggest compliment, and tell them all about how much you love to sew, how much you love your new dress or bag, and how you would love to help them learn to sew as well (if they want to). Yay! Feel proud, you did an awesome job.
Why do people ask?
Maybe people are just disappointed when you go out in ready to wear and they look forward to seeing your own original creations, something that makes you stand out from the crowd. It can be a real conversation starter to ask if you made your own outfit and when you say no, you bought this one, oh, OK. If you didn't make it, then do chatter on about what you are working on right now, or a recent project you are particularly proud of – that person wouldn't have asked if they weren't interested to know.
My hubby loves it when I wear things I've made myself. Makes him feel really proud, and he tells everyone that I made my dress I'm wearing. I don't always have the right thing to wear for every event so when he asks if I'm going to wear one of my dresses, sometimes I have to say no because I might not have something dressy enough, but then he always encourages me to at least take one of my bags. Makes me feel good about myself and my sewing that he wants to be seen out with me in something I've made. To me, that's the biggest and best compliment of all.
Your turn
Tell me, what do you think? Is it a compliment if someone asks if you made something yourself? How do you answer?
I make clothes for a small living, more for the enjoyment of making special clothes for people who want something different. I love my sewing and am very proud for myself or anyone to wear my clothes that I make. It fits them perfectly and its one of a kind. That is why I do sewing. Most of the things that I sew, people have often asked where did i buy that outfit from, and when i respond telling them that i made it for myself or for someone they ask if i would make some clothing for them. I take very big pride in my work and love my sewing so much. I can’t go without my sewing for longer than 1 or 2 days max. Even if it’s to fix a zip or to just fix a small repair, but i have to sew most days. I’m constantly looking for new and exciting things to sew and create and love it when i get people asking me to make their special outfits for them. My sewing is my absolute life.
In my circle of friends it would most definitely be a compliment and they would want to hear all about it.
Sometimes I am happy…sometimes not. The situation carries the response by if I’m feeling a good or not so good vibe. Im still learning to sew and still learning to trust myself. I know this is a cryptic answer…but true!
I usually take it as a compliment but sometimes I stop and wonder if they think it looks handmade. My granddaughters love everything I make so they are my best inspiration.
I take it as a compliment. It’s usually because they can’t imagine finding it in any store – it looks custom-made.
I am a happy puppy. Its a compliment if someone asks me that question. I am not an expert in sewing but i am improving in it. I would be glad if people recognised that i am sewing my own clothes.
I was taught by my mum when I was very young, I went into be a dress maker for a job which I enjoyed and I still enjoy making things even though I’m now medically retired. I also do a lot of hand knitting.
I’m a happy puppy:). I”ve been sewing since I was five on a little sewing machine I was given for my Birthday, mum used to cut out something & tell me where to stitch .I’m 70 now & many years later Tafe courses & all, I still loved to be comlemented
I always say YES, ISN’T IT GREAT! I am always proud of everything I make. Even from the beginning, I was proud. Not everyone can sew. My Mom taught me to sew when I was 9 or 10. Sewing simple at first but then I progressed from there. Love sewing and I have taught my girls and son to sew. Sadly only my youngest has really taken it up. The others know the basics though. Sewing is a craft that needs to be passed on to as many people as possible, if we don’t, then it could become a lost art. I try to pass on any art or knowledge that I possess. Just like I try to learn any art or knowledge that I don’t know.
I don’t mind if they ask – but I HATE when the reaction to “yes” is that they feel they need to touch it. Friend or stranger, they need to feel the fabric maybe even turn up the collar to look at the underside or tug at the jacket lapel so they can see the lining. I also knit, and that’s even worse! I’ve had people not only grab the end of a scarf to feel it but then rub it against their face! I consider this whole thing an invasion of my personal space, so I’ve learned to say yes as I take a few steps out of range. And sometimes friends(?) become irate if you are unwilling to make a similar blazer or knit a similar sweater for them. I’ve learned to say that I have so many things I want to make for myself first, but I will if I ever catch up.
Ha ha – I am an in between, I bravely wear it because I like it and I am proud of it, but until someone compliments it then I tell them I made it. i never offer the info., but once they have, they start asking me if I made what I am wearing. Doesn’t matter, I am having fun and there are things up in my sewing room I have not had the courage to wear yet.
I love to sew, I learnt to sew by watching YouTube videos and practicing with my friends machine and whenever I make something for myself, I will always wear it with a big smile, and when people ask if I made it my smile grows bigger and I quickly say yes, I did, do u like it? Do you want one, I’ll make it for you free if you bring your own fabric, and then we go on and start discussing clothes, only few people took me up on my offer. Now years later after I have gone to learn to sew properly from a fashion house, I believe a lot of those questions were not meant to be compliments, but my response made it one.
That depend who is askin. But mostly I am proud of what I made. And when my friend who is a sewing teacher ask did you buy that , I defenitly know I did a good job. That makes me proud !!!
I am very proud when people look at the things I’ve made and tell me they are beautiful. I often don’t sew for myself but when I do I really get great comments. I am a very proud sewer and make sure that everything that I do sew looks like you have bought it at a very expensive boutique. I very often show my friends what I’m sewing and then the completed item and they all say that my seeing it absolutely beautiful. They have often said that I should advertise myself more and get more sewing jobs, but I very often doubt my own accomplishments. From people who don’t sew to people that do, they often tell me my work is outstanding. I truly love to sew daily and enjoy making new and different creations.
It’s an awesome feeling when someone asks ‘where can I get what you’re wearing?’ And I answer ‘ I made it, would you like one’. May cost a little more for homemade, however the garment is better finished than store bought. My daughter’s wedding gown is my proudest achievement more so with heartfelt compliments
Thank you for this discussion. I have sewn on and off over the years and now at nearly 80 have started again and am learning to sew bags that include sewing zips which I have always tried to steer away from. Having a great time.
I like when people compliment my projects. I am proud of what I do in my sewing room.
I wouldn’t be too concerned about your sewing not looking as good as store made items. I have seen a lot of cloths lately in stores, etc. that have all kinds of sewing flaws in them (zippers not even at the top; stripes and plaids not matched at the side seams and sleeves, etc., arm holes way too big on sleeveless dresses, no darts in most things you find in stores, etc.). I see things, even on the shopping channels, that do not have the stripes and plaids lined up correctly on the side seams, etc.
Homemade is always better. My mother and grandmother made cloths for me when I was growing up. They were always perfectly fitted, hemmed well, fit correctly around the arm holes and shoulders, etc. I try to sew but, somehow, I never can get it done as well as they did. I have a hard time finding cloths that fit me as well as the cloths they made for me in my youth and early work career.
Be proud of what you make and don’t worry about what others think.
Very happy to hear it from people. I very well take it as a compliment and enjoy talking about it.
I started sewing a year ago and since there’s are no classes on making clothes I have had to figure everything out slowly and painfully, but I love the challenge. I mostly sew clothes for my kids, but I’ve made myself a small number of things.
My hope is that someone will ask me where I bought an outfit I’ve made, but if they can tell I’ve made it then I assume I messed up on it somehow and I get insecure about it. If I actually had someone to help me learn the proper way then I’d probably have more confidence in what I’m making.
All this to say, alas, I cringe when people ask me and wonder where o went wrong.
I was very thankful but still kind of embarrassed.
Confidently, I treat it as a compliment!
I love it when asked if I made it myself. I’ve sewed for 55 years, so feel I am fairly good at it!
I definately take it as a compliment. I love the reactions I get from clients or anyone that sees what I do.
Compliment, always!!! So a very happy puppy 😉
Happy puppy. Everyone knows that I am a seamstress, so when they ask me if I made it myself it is usually with a tinge of jealousy, as if “oh my goodness, I would kill for one like it”. Makes me f
People have sometimes asked me where I bought my “dress” or skirt etc, and have said “Wow! That looks super!” (Thankfully I’ve never picked up on any snarkiness – they seemed genuinely impressed). So even if it was something simple to make, or there are flaws that I’m painfully aware of, I have realised that most people can’t make themselves anything, & are genuinely pleasantly surprised when u say you made it. Thankfully I feel less awkward these days, as I’m more accomplished at my sewing. Also, it certainly helps to have access to great, on-trend .pdf patterns, which is something I only discovered about a year or so ago, and which helps greatly to get that “bought” look ? and so much more convenient than paper patterns!
Something came up at a party I was at last weekend and I commented that I had made my phone bag. Everyone said the most amazingly wonderful things about it. I was most surprised as most of them were sewing ladies. Or maybe they appreciated the effort involved.
I ended up telling them all were to find the free pattern and embroidery design for the bag. Then one of them spotted the bigger bag that I had hanging on the back of my chair and asked rather incredulously, did I make that too. Simple proud response of YES.
I have learnt to be proud of my work and not to show where I could have done better. 🙂
When I was a child I used to always comment on the homemade dresses made by one much older sister. Neither of us knew how I knew what was homemade until I joined the Sewing Guild as an adult many, many years later. Where I learnt about pressing your work as you sew. That is, pressing your seams and pressing hems, etc. Not ironing. All my sister’s hems on the outfits she made were ’rounded’ even though she ironed them well, as she didn’t press as she went while sewing.
I usually take it as a compliment. Most of the time, people just admire what I’m wearing and I say, “Thanks, I made it myself!” and they are even more impressed. However, when I was younger, my mother made most of my clothes and I was just beginning to sew; one of my classmates looked down on my “home-made” clothes, not because they were poorly made, but because she was a snob. It just made me want to sew better. As I got older, I once found a dress in a store that cost over $100; I found a pattern and the same fabric and made it myself for a fraction of the cost! So, now I don’t worry about what people say!
Snob or not she was probably still jelous. Handmade is far better, unique, better fit and the quality can be controlled.
I’ve never been asked because I’m new to sewing and so no one really knows I do. But whenever someone compliments me on something I’m wearing that I did make, I’m beaming with pride to tell them ” Thanks! I made it myself!”
When I was in my twenties I was sewing all of my clothes. If someone would compliment me on what I was wearing, I would simply say thank you. If my husband happened to be with me, he would tell them I made it myself. I asked him not to do this because it embarrassed me. After that if someone said something about what I was wearing, he would tell them I bought it at Joann’s. He was so proud of what I was able to accomplish on my sewing machine. It still makes me uncomfortable, but I love that my husband is proud of me! His opinion is always very important to me!
“She bought at Joan’s” brilliant!
I loved the Joann’s comment!! I have to tell my husband that one.
Once some people ask me if I sew, then they ask me to mend their clothing. It’s really frustrating because a lot of it is just a little hand sewing and I know their capable of doing it, they just don’t want to. And most of the time I don’t get paid anything to do the repairs.
My response to that is to charge like a bull or offer to teach them how to do it themselves. 🙂
I used to make most of my own clothes when I was in my mid to late teens. A “friend” knew, as we were in a small Australian country town and a lot of women sewed for their family, and she would come up and say, did you make that?” When I’d proudly say yes, she’d say, “I knew because of that,” and point the top maybe it was the sleeve seam, and say, “the sewing is crooked,” or say something like that. Yes, she was mean. I don’t remember saying anything back. Looking back, I think she must have been jealous. Fortunately I was doing a course at night classes so I was always learning something new. I guess you just have to let those comments go.
Yes, you do, and indeed she was jealous. Anyone can learn to sew, but choosing the right fabric and the right pattern for yourself take some self-knowledge… perhaps this is what she was able to see on you.
I usually take it as a compliment., and smile.
I take it as a compliment. In fact, I’m always making random things and sharing them with family and friends, and I love it when someone asks them “where did you get that?” and they say “Jan made it.” So much so that I that’s what I named my blog.
I think if it’s not meant to be a compliment there will be a little snarkiness in the delivery. Usually that comes from a place you expect it. Frequently it will be tinged with a little envy. I can’t remember when I last heard it in that tone. Maybe junior high?
So I am like that slobbery little puppy, wagging tail and all.
Jan
I’ve sewn for many years – in the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s I seemed to be the only person I knew who ‘sewed’ and despite the fact that I was fairly happy with what I made I got the feeling from others that ‘home made’ was ‘looked down’ on. However, more recently sewing has become popular and I think the ability to sew is appreciated more and I’m now proud to say ‘yes’ I made this and I love sewing and ‘yes’ I could make that for you but I don’t have time…! Carry on sewing !!
I always take it as a compliment now, when I was younger and less confident I would point out my mistakes and wonder if it looked “homemade”.
Now I just glow and accept the compliments!
I loved reading this article. I make bags and have only been sewing a few years now. I guess I’m extremely insecure because whenever someone asks me if I made my bag/purse I spend the next few minutes pointing out what I could’ve done better! It’s like I want to point out the flaws before they have a chance to judge me and usually the flaws are so small or non existent they would never notice them if I’d just smile and be proud of my work! My hubby keeps telling me to stop pointing things out because he’s a perfectionist and doesn’t notice and he’s so proud of me! Thanks for helping me look at things differently!
I always take it as a compliment. I am proud of everything I sew. Not every item is perfect, but that’s OK. I know I do an excellent job and perfection is next to impossible. Usually when people ask where I got something, and I tell them I made it, they respond with incredulity. They can’t believe I made something so nice! I’ve never had anyone give me a negative reaction.
I’m sorry, but I can’t understand people worrying that it’s not good enough. If it’s good enough for me, I don’t care what anybody else thinks. If anyone ever responds negatively to someone stating that they made it, I think it’s because they are jealous and insecure, because they know they couldn’t do it.
When the next question is, “Can you make me one?” I’ve learned to respond with, “I’m sorry; I barely have time to sew for myself and my family.” I’m not interested in sewing for others, so I don’t let anyone pressure me into doing it.
I am my worst critic. I know where are the flaws are in the things that I make, and to be truthful, 99% cannot be seen. So, if someone asks if I made it, yes, I take it as a compliment.
Though I try to be as meticulous as possible, one of the things I decided early on in learning to sew was to always be happy with my work. And yes, try to do better next time! If you do not love your work, then why do it?
I am Denise Johnson from South Africa. My sewing started by hand when I was 9years old. Growing up, I was extremely neat and organised. Made doll clothes. Crotchet a skirt at the age of 9 too. Beautiful pink and black. I am now 57 still seeing, loving every minute. Would like to teach the younger generation this amazing skill. To keep them off the streets. I remember sewing all my children’s baby sets..from snugbag, nappy bag, cot bumper, quilt and did not waste material. I love this new machine and would be able to finish off my garments more professional and look smart. And say Yes I made this!! Thank you for this interesting site.
Denise Johnson again. Yes I feel very proud and honoured when people make comments on my garments. It is a beautiful skill and I always encourage others to also sew.
Usually someone likes my outfit, and they want to know where I bought it. I tell them I designed it and constructed it myself. I never say I made something. I am a craftsmanship, and proud of it.
I love it when they ask! We (quilter’s & seamstresses) seem to think there are many that can do this but that’s because we know so many others that do. There are many more people out there that do not have the talent. I take it as a compliment and often those that ask are the ones that do wish they could do it also. I’m lucky to have a daughter in-law that loves all my sewing & quilting. She treasures all that I make for her & proudly shows them off to her friends telling them how much she loves her MamaDee’s homemade gifts. Not too many can say that of a daughter in-law. Happy sewing!
It’s not that I read it as an insult, but it’s usually followed by ‘could you make me one’. And then followed by outrage when I quote a price.